Making sense 12/29 pm


I expected today to be quiet. Kate and I hanging out, taking down Christmas decorations while Guy rested and slept. That is pretty much how it went only because we are stuck in medical gridlock

This morning Guy seemed even less responsive, he was asleep most of the morning, and I don’t mean a restful sleep but tossing and turning, labored breathing, talking nonsense and grimacing. He was not interested in food or water. Kate and I decided I should call the Cancer Center and inquire about hospice. I didn’t think he was ready but decided an evaluation would be helpful. Well, they said insurance won’t pay for you to have hospice and still see your Dr. I certainly wasn’t  ready to give up on treatment so we put that idea on hold and planned to see the Dr next week as scheduled.

As the day went on we realized Guy was not improving, no food or water, mostly asleep and still talking nonsense. He did develop this funny idea every time he woke up that he needed a shower. Rather than argue I just let him do it. He had 4 showers today. Kate gave him a kiss on the head and said he smelled wonderful!

I called the Cancer center again late in the day. I just don’t know what help he needs and from who? But it is apparent that he needs help. I spoke to Dr Lonergan, told him Guy’s symptoms and discussed options. We decided that starting hospice might offer some relief, if Guy improves then we can take him off hospice and he can see the Dr again and get more treatment. Of course by this time hospice has no availability till next Tuesday. Does any of this make sense??

Meanwhile Matt and Gwen arrived from Seattle. We had a nice dinner and laughed and told Guy stories (I cried some) He said he is a blessed man. I believe we are a blessed family. We feel so supported from friends around the world. It warms my sad heart to hear from all of you and know that you are holding him close in your hearts and prayers.

I am still working on getting a hospice evaluation sooner with some folks I know at the hospital. Stay tuned for tomorrow’s episode….of Cancer Sucks!

8 thoughts on “Making sense 12/29 pm

  1. My heart is shattered and I am unable to fathom any of this. It just is not real. Lee, please know that you guys are all in my every thought, every second of every day. Reinforcements are on the way…we will be there soon! Until then, the California Arbo/Miller Clan is praying for a miracle. If anyone is going to beat this, if anyone is meant to beat this, it is my brother. Sending all my love.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Dear Arbos,
    You all are in our thoughts and prayers constantly since hearing the news. I know that God is close to your family right now and giving you comfort. Your brave words and spirit reflect it! Hugs to all of you, we love y’all. Jere and Marcy


  3. Lee, I am completely at a loss for words, other than to say that you and Guy (and the rest of your family) are in my thoughts and prayers. You are being amazingly strong!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. No words, but hugs, love, prayers to all of your family. You are so strong to be posting all this. I so admire your strength. Guy is so lucky to have all of you as his caregiver and advocate.


  5. Hi Lee, I am so saddened to hear about my long time friend Guy. I have known Guy since he was in 8th grade at St Mels. I was in 6th grade at Our Lady of Grace. Crespi’s high school coach Bill Leeds recruited both Guy and I before we were enrolled at Crespi. While we were in grammar school we would practice with Crespi’s cross country and track teams. Through the years everything I know about Guy as a person is his authentic and genuine personality, humble, kind, passionate, love for people and life. Cant forget his love of Ducks Football!! As an athlete, he is one of the best to ever compete as a runner. The amount of words to describe him are endless. To mention a few, the ones that come to mind are tenacious, fighter, strong willed, heart, competitor and winner.

    Please know that everyone is cheering on Guy supporting him while he is running the longest race of his life. As many are ringing in the New Year please know that we are all ringing in New Year praying for Guy, you and the family.


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